letter to Krishen

Dear Krishen,

I miss you. I miss already. Melvin messaged me a couple of hours ago and told me you were gone.

I remember the first time I met you. It was my first rehearsal for “Prelude to a Kiss” at Action’s Room Upstairs. You struck me as this terribly old man who sits there, and not actively chatting up anyone. You were nice and warm when we greeted and had a nice handshake. I remember I was amazed by you, by how you could sit there and sleep but miraculously wake up when actors screw up or miss lines. So amazing. I remember too, that you were so calm when I was so panicky when the songs were not decided and it was only a few days till the bumpin. I’ve never done any show where the house music was confirmed only during the bump-in. And some of the show songs too. You kept telling me that everything was cool and you could work with anything we had. I also remember that ‘ritual’ of praying and feasting before we left the rehearsal space. Such an experience it was, when you talked about the spirits of the venue and how we were to thank them for letting us share the space with them and pray that they would protect us when we go to the new space.

I remember how you and Mac were quibbling over the lights. The one thing I remember clearly is how Mac would call you the “stupid old man”. *snigger* It was so sweet to see two long-time companions calling each other names but really knowing that it was all in good friendly jest.

The time you disappeared during the post-production party of “Prelude”and we had to search high and low for you. Bee Bee was so anxious. Haha. I also remember how you forced me to eat that chocolate cake for Caroline’s birthday. All my 20 years I never had a cake stuffed in my mouth before. >
And just when I thought I’d never have the chance to work with you again, I was roped in to do “Visit of the Tai-tai”. Yaay! I remember the warm feeling when I saw you again, sitting at the director’s table with your eyes closed. I could see that you were happy to see me again and so was I. “Visit” would have been doubly boring if not for you hanging around all night. We would fuss over whether you had a chair to sit, reminding you to take your medicine or not to take so much sweet things. I still remember how you always fondly complain that Juraidah treats you as if you were going to die. Sigh.

It was also fun going out for supper with you, Pauline, Vivianne and Ying Qi. Porridge at Chinatown! It was amusing hearing your recount of how you thought everyone didn’t like you during some old show and only knowing then that they were just afraid of you! Haha..

I’ll pray for you Krishen. I’ll pray even though I’m not a Christian or Catholic. I believe good people will go to heaven and I’ll pray.

Goodbye Krishen. Goodbye. I’ll miss you. WE’ll miss you. Goodbye.


Lots of Love,